On Being Thankful

11 weeks out from delivering our beautiful girl, I find I have been really down on my body.  It doesn’t even look like it did before Cricket… not even at the same weight.  Things don’t fit the same.  I don’t feel the same.  I look at it and it looks like the body of someone else, someone older and doughier.

I took 10 weeks of maternity leave full-time, and 2 weeks part-time from home.  These 2 weeks have been an eye opener… I struggle to get work done, and keep Cricket taken care of.  To pump and feed.  To do laundry and clean house.  To make delicious and nutritious meals…  Working full-time and caring for an infant will be no joke.

I haven’t found time to exercise while on maternity.  A few walks here and there…  Some strength training spattered in there as well.  I don’t imagine it will be better when I get to working full-time in the office again.  And that makes me so sad because I truly wanted to start out with habits during this transition in our life that I could share and show Cricket.  It makes me feel like I’m failing her already.

And then I thought about how lucky I am to be where I am at with my body.

Because I have a beautiful baby girl, whom I love more than the world.

Because I am so lucky that my body carried and delivered her to us.

Because my body provides her with milk and comfort.

And I am so thankful for those things…

And for this girl…
best day ever
1 week old
so little... so tired


You Never Know Where Motivation Might Find You…

At the end of April, after having started P90X with Hubs about two weeks prior, I felt like I was ready to add cardio to the mix…

When I have that urge to do more cardio, I always come back to thinking… “Why don’t I just start running… again…?”  Generally, I start out being overly ambitious and then end up running out of steam when I pushed myself too hard and my body fights back.  I just needed something to help me start out slowly, because I’m still too all-or-nothing for my own good, and without outside permission, I would start to ambitious AGAIN and “fail” AGAIN.   As per usual, I was having a hard time going from the wanting to  run, to actually running.  I honestly and truly believe there’s a higher power out there the helps out if you’re willing to listen…

Don’t you know right as I was starting to focus in on wanting to re-start my running I something that motivated me.

I was on Facebook on April 29th and I saw someone “liking” MindSpark with Adam Hergenrother…  And the name jumped out at me, because I went to high school with Adam Hergenrother.  I went to a small enough school where you generally knew everyone.  And I remembered at our high school reunion a couple of years ago thinking how he seemed really happy and comfortable in his skin.  He seemed like a real life success story.  In high school, he was kinda heavy-set; now he is he got really fit.  He is a highly regarded real estate agent, with his own team.  His wife was really sweet and they seemed super happy.  When I remembered how happy and successful he seemed at the reunion, I decided to check out his MindSpark thing and this 30 Day Challenge.  I ended up spending a couple of hours viewing YouTube videos, reading post, checking out  his website...   I really am into personal improvement, and his website and Facebook page have a wealth of resources for that sort of thing.  If you like that kinda thing, I would suggest exploring it for yourself!

So how does this tie into my whole wanting to start running and a nudge in the right direction?

Enter the 30 Day Challenge…  I was really liked the concept…  I liked what he was saying, I liked what he was doing with this 30 Day Challenge… and I liked that it was motivating me to want to do it myself!

The concept is pretty simple:

1) Run/Walk/Jog a mile a day.

2) Replace one bad meal a day with a good one.

3) Reflect on your WHY… Why do you get out of bed in the morning?  What is it that propels you forward in life?

Beyond being simple…  It seemed doable.  WITHOUT being overwhelming.

I already walked the dog a few miles most days.  I wanted to start running again.  And it gave me “permission” to run a mile and not start out with some crazy 2-3 mile run and burn out the very next day.  It was a small enough challenge to be rewarding because I could see the “finish line”.  And achievable.  The consistency of running regularly has allowed me to see progress this month.  Because I fizzle out so quickly usually, I think I give up before giving myself the opportunity to see the progress.   This morning I actually felt extra good so I went for 2 miles. 🙂

I do have to say, that if I didn’t already have our P90X thing in place, I wouldn’t have been as apt to do this…  I have to give credit to Hubs.  He has been the driving motivation there.  He LOVES P90X, so he actually wants to do it regularly.  And that makes me want to as well.  Plus I love how much stronger it makes me feel.   For me, having the muscles that support my knees strong is KEY to being able to run without injury.  I have a condition that created bone spurs in some of my joints.  My knees were affected the worst, and I’ve had some arthritis in them since I was very young.  When I keep my knees healthy and tight, I’m not limited and I don’t feel as much of the effects of the arthritis.  It keeps me from having to take pain killers (which with my stomach issues, I prefer to avoid).  I’ve recently read up on using massage to help with the pain when I have it rather than ibuprofen.  And will be incorporating that into my life starting… umm… today!   Since I finally seem to be on the other-side of my Achilles tendonitis, I’ve been able to manage that with proper footwear, stretching, compression and my tigertail, thankyouverymuch.  Because these things were already in place, adding the 30 Day Challenge was easier than it otherwise would have been if my muscles weren’t already in good shape for running.

What I really wanted most to get out of the 30 Day Challenge was to focus on running again.

The rest I didn’t expect much out of…

I already eat pretty clean.  I might eat too much, but it’s generally clean, real, whole food.  I will admit, the replacing one bad meal with a good one has been kicking around in the back of my brain… I’ll take any little reminder that keeps me remembering how much better I feel eating clean… so that was a nice side bonus!

As you know my life is so different and so much better than it was a year ago.  With having made such big changes, I wasn’t sure there was much more introspection to do.  I quit the bank, I have my business… what more could I want right now… I was so wrong… The hidden “gift” of the 30 Day Challenge IS objective #3.

Spending time on my WHYs and visualizing where I want my life to go is helping me feel more focused about my personal and professional development.  Originally, I kinda thought of that part as an “If I got bored” task.  Spending time with thinking on my WHY in life has really helped to keep me focused and keep me choosing to walk in the direction of a life that more accurately reflects that.  I guess for me, it’s reminding me to live authentically… and helping me better determine what that authentic life looks and feels like.  It’s nice to actually feel confident in the direction I want to take my life because it is a thought out process, not something willy-nilly.

It’s been almost a month and I’m still getting out there every day to run, or walk.  This whole thing just is such a great reminder that you never know where motivation or that little push might come from.  If you had asked me if some guy I knew from high school would  be the  motivational push I needed to start running again…  I honestly would have looked at you like you were crazy.  Live with your heart and mind open because you truly never know where those things that can help your life along might come from.